Germans. Americans. SEX EVERYWHERE!
Actually there wasn’t that much sex in Inglorious Basterds. I mean, given the high-tension espionage scenes, blood-thirsty Nazi-killers, drop-dead-doable French goddess Mélanie Laurent………..
…you’d think there’d be more sex thrown into the mix. Maybe some Brad Pitt ass for the ladies?
I saw the movie last week and I was definitely hoping for a little more sex. Maybe a boobie? No? Ok, well then we’ll just have to settle for wonderfully graphic Nazi scalpings with dull blades, a shit load of guns, and Brad Pitt (Lt. Aldo Raine) perfecting a special kind of body-mod artistry.
On the topic of Brad Pitt–he has redeemed himself in the mind’s of those of us that would have rather ripped out our hair strand-by-strand upon the two-and-a-half hour mark into Benjamin Button and taken our hand out of our mouth on which we had been gnawing on our thumb bone out of pained boredom for the past hour in order to check our watches only to realize that there was still another half-an-hour to go! (The same sort of redemption Johnny Depp now owes his fans after Public Enemy committed the crime of “why is this movie not over yet?”).
Back to Inglorious Basterds:
As far as wads of phlegm go, Christoph Waltz (Col. Hans Landa) is as funny as a Nazi-slime-monster can be.
If you’ve nerded-out and read the script before catching the flick, you’ll find that it’s a little different. The interracial intimacy in the Nazi-occupied France is implied between Jacky Ido (Marcel the handy man, man–hand–y quiero mis manos cerca de Mélanie Laurent ahora!) and Melanie Laurent (Shoshanna Dreyfus)………
…..sssaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhh….Mélanie Laurent…..
Anyway, here’s the thing: Inglorious Basterds kicks ass! I’m serious. If it has ever been your dream to use Hitler’s body like my dog uses a dead bird’s corpse…
…then check out this film; the best feel-good movie that Quentin Tarantino could conjure up in the dark, vengeful, bottomless pit of human body parts and intriguing conversation that composes QT’s twisted mass of gilded tissue; what doctors hesitate to call a human brain.
Here’s the trailer:
If you do not see Inglorious Basterds, you’re just as bad as Hitler. And for that: shame on you.















es. (the new stuff at least)



