Not Drugs – Art, Graffiti, Music and Culture for the Almost Grown-Up

I’m not gonna speak on behalf of the Country music fanbase, or the Classical Songwriting fanbase, or even the Pop music fanbase. I just wanna chat about the hip hop categories at the Grammy’s, because that’s all I have the ability to have an educated opinion about. I don’t know anything about the nomination process, and why each of these artists got the nod over others, and frankly, you don’t care and neither do it; so I’m still gonna spit my opinion even if I am ignorant in that aspect. And lastly, no matter what anyone else says (including my co-writers at Not Drugs), Lil Wayne should never be nominated for a Grammy, let alone win one. Plain and simple. Okay, let’s go on.

These are the categories dedicated to hip hop artists at the Grammy’s, along with the nominations to go with it:

Best Rap Album
Common – Universal Mind Control
Eminem – Relapse
Flo Rida – R.O.O.T.S.
Mos Def – The Ecstatic
Q-Tip – The Renaissance

Best Rap Solo Performance
Drake – “Best I Ever Had”
Eminem – “Beautiful”
Jay-Z – “D.O.A. (Death of Auto-Tune)”
Kid Cudi – “Day ‘N’ Nite”
Mos Def – “Casa Bey”

Best Rap Song
Drake – “Best I Ever Had”
Kid Cudi – “Day ‘N’ Nite”
T.I. & Justin Timberlake – “Dead And Gone”
Jay-Z – “D.O.A. (Death Of Auto-Tune)”
Jay-Z, Rihanna & Kanye West – “Run This Town”

Best Rap Performance By a Duo or Group
Beastie Boys & Nas – “Too Many Rappers”
Eminem, Dr. Dre & 50 Cent – “Crack A Bottle”
Fabolous & Jay-Z – “Money Goes, Honey Stay”
Kid Cudi, Kanye West & Common – “Make Her Say”
Kanye West & Young Jeezy – “Amazing”

Best Rap/Sung Collaboration
Beyoncé & Kanye West – “Ego”
Keri Hilson, Kanye West & Ne-Yo – “Knock You Down”
Jay-Z, Rihanna & Kanye West – “Run This Town”
The Lonely Island & T-Pain – “I’m On A Boat”
T.I. & Justin Timberlake – “Dead And Gone”

Just look them over again just so we’re on the same page. Okay, you’re set? Excellent. Here’s where I blow up…

Fucking Flo Rida is nominated for a Grammy!!???!?!?! What the fucking hell is wrong with America!!?!?!?!!?? I cannot believe that a man who makes a living rapping about Apple Bottom Jeans and Boots with the Fur is nominated for an album, ironically as fuck, entitled R.O.O.T.S. What the Fuck!

Douche. Bag.

Alright, a little better now.

For real though, how can Flo Rida be nominated for a Grammy? Was there really that much of a drop off in talent this year that you just couldn’t find someone better than this turd of a rapper to nominate? I had J Dilla, Doom, K’Naan and Kid Cudi right off the top of my head to replace Flo Rida. I could go into detail about Common’s album being a complete piece of crap and Eminem’s Relapse being just a joke, but you expect that from the people nominating for the Grammy’s. Flo Rida? I didn’t expect that.

My hopeful winner of the category? Q-Tip. Honestly, I have no expected winner, besides Q-Tip, becuase if any of the other albums win (besides Mos), the credibility that good rap will ever be commercially rewarded goes down the drain.

The next category, Drake will win; no doubt in my mind Drake will win that. As much as I don’t really like the cat, the dude blew up to a point that I didn’t think was conceivable for someone coming from a teen drama aired on Nickelodeon’s Noggin network (he was the dude in the wheelchair!). The song went crazy on the radio, and I can’t see it not winning. Eminem won’t win (anything he’s nominated in he shouldn’t win because of the ridiculously weak effort he put into the past 2 years)  and I don’t think this is Jay-Z’s category (I can’t see “D.O.A” winning anything with how big “Run this Town” was).

Who I hope is gonna win? Obviously Mos Def, but it won’t happen. I am really glad to see The Ecstatic being nominated though. If that’s all Mos Def is gonna get, I think I can handle that, but it would be pretty dope for him to win. Drake wins this one.

The best song category is basically the same as the last category; I don’t understand it. You take out Mos, and put in another Jay-Z song, and take out Eminem (good) and add T.I. and J.T. (ugh), and the rest stays. The category is weird cause you have Run This Town, which should win, but then you have another Jay-Z track to take votes away. Drake is still strong, but now you throw a T.I. and J.T. song in there that was on the radio for what seemed like once an hour every hour for an entire year.

This category makes me ill because each song makes me throw up a little (the Jay-Z stuff is good, but I just can’t listen to that album anymore because of what the radio did to the few good tracks on that album — minus the one with J. Cole, still love that song). I hope Jay-Z takes how the Grammy for this one (D.O.A over Run this Town, but that’s highly unlikely), but look for Drake to take it again, or maybe T.I. pulls out one of his guns and has Drake hand deliver the Grammy to him instead. Either way, this category sucks.

The next category is hysterical. Nas and The Beastie Boys? Fabolus and Jay-Z? Eminem, Dre, and Fiddy? So funny. Highly doubt they’ll give the Grammy to Nas and Beastie’s (also highly doubt any of them will be there). Fabolus? No. Fiddy? Nope. Now let’s move on to the only two choices that stand a chance.

Which Kanye song was better? My obvious choice is Cudi and Common’s collab. Jeezy is terrible and if he gets a Grammy, I might gag on my fist. So I say “Make Her Say“ should and will win the Grammy.

And just a side note, this is the most half-assed thrown together category I’ve ever seen. So few words describe how unappealing hip hop is when Jeezy is representing you. Just terrible.

And now the last category. It’s hard to give much of an opinion here, because I’ve only heard the bottom three songs (then again, I don’t think Beyonce stands a chance here, nor does Ne-yo and Keri Hilson). Do the Lonely Islands win? Maybe. But that will set hip hop back about three decades.

If The Lonely Islands win, that would be like giving Weird Al best Pop record when he did Eat It. It’s a straight pun, and even nominated it is a smack in the face. Here’s what happened:

Grammy’s Committee member #1: So I kinda didn’t listen to most of those hip hop songs this year.

Grammy’s Committee member #2: Yeah, I mean, how could you with Taylor Swift running things.

#1: I mean, can we add another Kanye song? I think we can add another Kanye song.

#2: Wait, what about that rap thing about the boat. That was funny, we can just add that. I mean, T-Pain’s in it; those people will be happy.

#1: Good. Settled. Can we now listen to Party in the U.S.A. again?

#2: Fine, but this is the last time.

That’s what happened, and now Andy Samberg is laughing about the high percentage he has of winning a Grammy, for a hip hop category.

Who do I want to win? Damn…does it matter? I geuss Run This Town wouldn’t be too bad. T.I. and J.T. will probably win though.

So that’s my pre-Grammy chat with predictions and hopefuls. I’m thinking or trying to do a running diary of the Grammy’s when it starts at…8pm? Yeah, that sounds right. I don’t know how it’s gonna work/if it will at all, but I’m gonna try and provide you with as much entertainment as possible without shedding any of my blood when Flo Rida’s name is announced as a nominee (and if he wins…don’t even bother calling 911, I’ll be dead before they get here).

So tune into the Grammy’s (in seven minutes and counting) on CBS. I’ll be watching the Nets until then (down by 6? Can they do it? Did the announcers just call Jarvis Hayes our best shooter? Foreshadowing…damn).

Dwb.

I saw Exile do this like 2 months ago when he performed with Blu. Now he’s at it again with his boy Fashawn (who is severely Dope by the way; check out his album Boy Meets World produced entirely by Exile. Crazy ill).

And if you’re still wondering why I want an MPC, or why you don’t have one yet, you are just kidding yourself (and also, watch Fashawn go crazy on Exile’s impromptu beat; a young spitter worthy of recognition):

Dwb.

People always wanna know / Where do I be at?

Where I’m is? / Yo, I’m on the porch chillin’ at the crib

If you got a question about dope shit / What it is?

Let a nigga know / Tell me how you feel

People think Phil put Jordan on the map / Matter fact

Them words ain’t goin’ / Where I’m at

And with that/ Everybody on the planet, where you at?

Just let ya heads bang / Like there’s hammers in ya hat

- The Cool Kids, “Hammer Bros.”

Just had that on blast  in my car on my way home.  Lyrical hoodrats or poetic thugs?  The Cool Kids are a little bit of both.

Throw them together with Creative Control (Some of the few cats left I believe to be dedicated to releasing high quality video content.  Dig their stuff here.), Ski Beats and Stalley and you have an video that redefines I-L-L.

WE CAN DO IT BIG from Creative Control on Vimeo.

Dear Current/Aspiring/Future Music Video Producers,

Step.  Your. Game. Up.

- Not Drugs

On the real.  This is dope.  It’s long and at times it lags…but the ferocity with which this man speaks these days is S-I-C-K.

I wasn’t as impressed with Obama as everyone else in the beginning.  Not even a few years ago.

But he won me over.  And I’m a hard crowd, kids.

Obama’s a monster…and I was wrong…ish.

One.

The 2010 State of the Union Address from White House on Vimeo.

I never really wanted to learn any instrument. When I was younger, I thought I wanted to play the drums, then the bass, then the guitar, then back to the bass, then the drums…and it kinda just went around in a circle for about 12 years or so.

As of my recent years, though, I’ve realized that the one instrument I truly every really want to play, or better yet, want to excel at, is the MPC.

What’s an MPC? It’s this:

A drum machine, with 9, or 12 buttons that are designated a certain drum sound (snare, bass, cymbol). The sounds could also be synth like noises, or even vocals, but it’s one specific sound. There are various presets and such to change the tone or pitch, and whatnot, and you could also record into the machine to save certain melodies you create. It’s a fantastic instrument…

That’s right,  I said instrument. Because that’s what it is. It doesn’t have strings, or involve creating a noise without any pre-recordings involved, but it still is something that is used to create music. And it’s my favorite way to do so.

Watch this video and you’ll see why I love it so:

It’s brilliant, so brilliant, and I want to be that brilliant.

Maybe this is the year I finally pick up an instrument…

Dwb

Raise your hand if you remember when I talked about how F’n Fantastic DJ Fuzzy Duck is?

one, two, three…okay, I see those hands.

Well, I’m gonna say it again, and this time, I have a credible source backin’ me up.

Fuzzy Duck used to be a staple in the Ithaca nightlife (I say this like it was 20 years ago, when really it was about 2 months ago). He’s moved on to the cold north of Madison, Wisconsin, but that doesn’t mean the noise has subsided. If anything, it’s just gotten louder so we can still hear it all the way in New York.

Fuzzy’s still pumpin’ out the goods; and by goods, I mean Russell Simmons approved funk-a-phonic grooves.

That’s right, Russell Simmons gave the thumbs up to Fuzzy Duck. Now you have absolutely no excuse not to listen to Fuzzy.

But now the question is, “But he’s all the way in Wisconsin, how will I ever be able to listen to him now?”

When have I ever made things hard for you? Here’s the mix that Mr. Simmons was diggin’ on. It’s entitled Stash Bash. You could dance to it, walk to it, drive to it, clean to it, make raunchy love to it…whatever you please.

Here’s the mix, for free. Do as you want with it. As long as you give it a listen, neither Fuzzy, nor I, nor Russell Simmons would mind.

DWB.

Nothing is timeless anymore.  Everything is new and souped-up and slick.  Rugged will not exist in the 2010s.  And that’s something that truly saddens me.  You, more than likely, saw this yesterday:

This is Apple’s new iPad…or as I like to call it: The absolute end of print anything.  We’re not going to need magazines soon, because they’ll all be digital. (Half of them are already headed that way, anyway.)  However, print journalism is not the only thing dieing out.  In a few years, kids are not going to have to lug books home to and from school.  There texts will be right there…on the iPad.  You won’t need to purchase that copy of The Great Gatsby or The Cather in The Rye anymore…or borrow it from a friend. (I straight up split both of those books with my locker partner in high school.)

Why?  Because you’ll have it right on your iPad.  And perhaps it will be easier…I mean, it will definitely be easier.

But not the same.

There’s something timeless about holding a book.  Putting it down and picking up.

There’s something timeless about lugging a shitload of books to school during finals week.  That was half the work, man.

There’s something timeless and picking up a magazine in the grocery store or on the street corner…whether your a devout reader or it just catches your eye.  And that feeling…that timelessness…is about to roll out  Peace.  Hasta.  What-have-you.

Thank you, Steve Jobs…for forcing to me to evolve faster than I wanted to.

On the other hand, the combination of new and timeless is kind of dope.  I definitely want to cop these Wooden Turntables I’ve been staring at for at least an hour.

Stay up, kids.

As number of systems owned increases, average yearly salary at age 34 increases.
As number of systems owned increases, number of times laid per sophomore year of high school decreases.
As number of systems owned increases, number of times laid per life increases.
As number of systems owned increases, likelihood of finding gold stuck to the bottom of your shoe increases .0097% per 8/11ths of game console.

I’ve had 15, how about you?

Easiest way to realize that you’re getting older: You’re childhood heroes start to disappear.  At least mine are:

Allen Iverson’s getting pity/idiotic votes into the NBA All-Star Game, but is clearly not an All-Star anymore.

Brett Favre’s still barely clinging on, although, he is doing so in an incredible fashion.  Keep in mind though, he can’t go on forever.

And Conan O’Brien is no longer going to be on television. (At least for another 7 months.)

I acknowledge this fact last night as the end of an era in my life and beginning of another.  My life Post-Conan-On-NBC.

Now here’s the DOPE part: He could of teared up and said his goodbyes, which he sort of did(and so did I)…or he could play “Free Bird” with Beck, Ben Harper, Billy Gibbons of ZZ Top and Will Ferrell.  Conan chose the latter.

If this performance isn’t bad ass, I’m not sure what is anymore.  Thanks a lot, Conan.

Vicariously announced through slightly less clandestine urban artist Mr. Brainwash, Banksy will be debuting a film entitled “Exit Through the Gift Shop” this Spring.

Spray paintin, law breaking, foulin up, runnin away, mischief–it all seems to be captured in this 85 minute reel of excitement.

Watch the preview:

The official page is banksyfilms.com.

And don’t forget to catch Mr. Brainwash’s exhibit at an as of yet undisclosed location in the NYC meatpacking district on Valentine’s Day.