There are exactly twenty-two million and three reasons why Los Angeles is better than every other city in the United States.
This is one of the top 5 reasons:
The Chicks be Flocking
The other night my roommate Jacob and I got back from a great night out. We saw Without a Home (check it out!), a beautiful documentary directed by a very talented director, Rachel Fleischer.
There was alcohol involved @ the premire, things got weird, I lost my new glasses, we drove home…
As we pulled into the driveway I noticed a pair of raptor claws on the other side of Jake’s parked FJ-Cruiser. I made Jake get out and survey the scene. During this time I recalled Jeff Goldblum’s trick for tracking dinosaurs by dripping water on the forearm of a hot woman.
Jake came back after a long time and said that there was a sick seagull on the other side of his car. The neighbor kids got excited about the chicken (Jake’s knowledge of the natural world once again proved sub-par) and their older brother, Ernesto, helped us capture the bird. We put her in a cage made from some spare chicken wire and a piece of the ABDC set that I brought home last week.
My other roommate, Stephen, set Shama (“SHAY-MA”) free later that night because he is a vegetarian. I didn’t understand his malnourished thought process and I steadily grew angry. Just plain angry. Like hormone-fueled testosterage.
Buuut:
Last night SHAMA CAME BACK!
And now she’s here to stay because I sliced off her wings with Steve’s bread knife.
